Question by Dennis E: Finally ready to change my life.. but not sure how?
So after years and years of doing nothing and just existing instead of really living, I finally decided to do something about my life.
I was always too scared to do anything.. so now I am 25 and haven’t achieved anything in life. Nothing really.
There have always been two things in my life that I wanted to do… see the word… and be an artist (filmmaker). While I did make some shorts and finished two screenplays.. i never put
half as much energy into it as i should and could. I know I can do it but i was always too lazy and scared to really do it. I had it all planed out two years ago.. i even had locations, the most basic crew and equipment.. but then put
a stop to it cause I thought i couldn’t pull it off… stupid.. but thats how it has been most of my life now. I don’t do the things I want to do and should do cause I am scared. Thats why I still life in my hometown even though it doesn’toffer me anything
and I grew to hate it over the years… and that’s why I had been stuck in bad paying jobs just cause I was too lazy and scared to reach out and do my thing. Fullfill my dream.
Well… I reached that point where I say.. STOP.. it’s enough. You either start living or you can just as well kill yourself.
So despite being scared shitless.. I did start.. or better said… am starting… starting to start 😉
I quit my job. quit my unhealthy relationship (which I somewhat regret cause now i’m depressed and lonely, but it just wasn’t good for either me or my ex), sold a lot of my stuff and have to be out of my apartment in two to three months.
So far so good… now I am confused though. The inital plan was to move to Berlin (I saved quite a bit of money over these boring last years), find a small cheap apartment, maybe find a small job that is fun.. .and then give 100% and write write write and trying to pull of that filmmaking thing.
BUT… there is also that other idea in my head.. the one about seeing the world. Cause as much as I want to fullfill my dream of making a film.. the dream about getting out there is almost as strong. A friend of mine went to Canada for a year for a work exchange program… I always envied her for that cause she just did it without thinking too much and always said it was one of the best times of her life. Well now I finally am ready to do something like that. I browsed the net for weeks and actually there are so many options… starting with Japan, New Zeeland.. sure it wouldnt be holidays cause you actually really have to work, but I think it would do a lot for me concerning personal growth and finally growing some balls 😉
Now I really don’t know what I should do… the seeing the world bit seems nice cause I would finally experience real live… the Berlin bit would be nice cause I would finally start working on that goal that I had since years. Then again the writing and
all that could be so much better if I had the experience from the trips out into the world.
Sure all could go wrong.. then I’d just return home and start that old job again.. but I think I’d rather do anything but that.. but still thats my safety net in the back of my head.
What do you think I should do? Both seems good.. both will do good for me.. I just don’t know for which one to go first.
Answer by 2
Fart all the 2 pple u know lor so easy talk so much for wat? imao! doggies do that all the times but i doubt it will be on OBAMA2! hahaha
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