Question by Peter: Nothing seems to be going right for me, and i hate life, help?
I am very depressed. I am not suicidal, but i am in despair. I am a guy, who has major difficulties in finding friends or being satisfied with people. The people who i enjoy being around hate being around me because i am not good enough for them. The people who i attract are losers, and they don’t make me feel good about myself, i really wanted a friend who i could lean on, and feel a connection with, you know maybe someone who cared about you? Im horrified at how fast time has flown by, im a senior in highschool and each year has gotten worse than the one before. I feel worthless, as my parents are jealous of all the students who are popular and good looking and in my despair i eat food because eating nice food gives me the closest feeling to the warmth i felt in my chest. This warmth was me being so excited about high school and happy, because before high school i thought i had finally found some friends, but it turns out they found some new friends and ditched me. I hate being so alone all the time, and i only hang out with the people who i hate because it pleases my parents and they stop insulting me. Ive become fat but not obese and life just sucks right now. All i want is to be good at one goddamn thing, and my dream of filmmaking is even hard for me. I took a film class, but the teacher sucks and we have 90’s equipment that dont work, and once again i am sucky at it.
I just feel like i am drowning in pain right now, when i look at all the people with their friends it makes me feel so hollow. I want to pursue film so i can become rich and famous, so they can see what they missed out on, i know that seems like the wrong reason to pursue it, but for once i want people to look up at me! People always say you have to love yourself, but how can i love myself when no one else does? The way my mom looks at me because i am fat, and how angry she is because i am not popular or the best in my class. I just want to be happy…
Answer by Dominiquee
maybe you can find something else that makes you happy. like you can get into a new tv show or singer. that helped me be acually excited and happy about something. excerise has been proven by studies to make you happy. and just listen to music helps in general. It helped me through a lot. I dont have friends either and Im not overweight or ugly or stupid or mean its just bad luck i suppose.
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